December 2011
45 posts
aw tonight is going to be really good
michelle’s picking lizzy and victor and i up at six and we’re gonna go look at the krismas lights at six flags and take pictures or whatever and then afterwards we’re going to vivian’s to party hard :-)
things actually go really smoothly when i’m not coordinating every event. weird.
the more i think about it the more i’m really excited that 2011 is over!!!!!! i think i can finally come to peace with everything that has happened this year and let it all go. i’ve made a lot of really bad decisions. among the obvious things (succumbing to alcoholism, smoking, “hook ups,” etc.), i’ve lied to my friends, lied to my parents and wasted a lot of time...
dinner was nice but i hate social events that revolve around me because i spend the whole event worrying about other people!!! i was really worried that zach and kye weren’t having fun - because they weren’t - but that’s dumb of me because i don’t think they really ever have fun.
but anyway yeah i was just kind of tense the whole time and i need to not do that! also...
day 10: new year resolutions.
stop being so sad for myself!!!!
quit eating so much
end this writer’s block
stop letting others’ negativity influence me
stop allowing my relationships (or lack thereof) to consume me
have a good year
i’m gonna do it you guys
it’s gonna be a good year from start to finish i’m gonna make it happen
oh and stop leaving major assignments until the very last...
day 9: the end of last school year/the beginning...
end of last year
i was a little sad it was over
i had no idea what would become of summer
i said good-bye to a lot of people
i think i said good-bye to a little of myself
beginning of this year
i was nervous
i didn’t really talk to anyone
i immediately fell into some sort of depression
i refused to be happy
stress
i’m glad a lot of this has improved!!!
day 8: the funnest getaway.
waco! and virginia. all the museums. austin. las vegas.
day 7: your birthday.
it’s still a work in progress
the actual day was boring albeit nice and i got a really neat camera!!!
day 6: your best friend(s).
victor
kleo
lizzy
alison
blair (?)
day 5: the most memorable moment.
i don’t know i’ll come back to this.
day 4: the worst day.
there were a lot of bad days but none of them so horrific that they stand out? i think the day i skipped half the day of school without telling anyone was one of my lowest lows.
day 3: the best day.
maybe the day we went to waco. yeah i choose that one.
day 2: relationship(s).
where do i start um
my relationships - this is inclusive of all relationships, not just romantic ones - with everyone have changed this year. i don’t even know how to explain it. i think the people that are far away got farther, and the people in my immediate proximity got closer.
i went from being good friends with josh and maybe more to having absolutely nothing to do with him ever in...
day 1: a few things you will never forget about...
the day i got my license
my slow progression into alcoholism
waco
summer parties and summer crushes
“camping”
the moment victor told me he loves me
minneapolis
the emotional breakdowns
mormon prom
cake
2o11 in words + photos
january: texans game (above 1) + matt and kim’s sidewalks (above 2) + license!!!! + blair’s birthday party + props crew
february: josh lewis loved me + i lied to my parents a lot + whalentine’s day + my brother in 12th night (above 1) + photo adventures with lizzy (above 2) + arcades (above 3)
march: on location reporting (above 1: covering a...
lol looking through my blog and i hated blair this time last year too
weird
wow this break has been super weird! i mean it’s not over yet but basically i’ve been a roller coaster of emotions which is odd considering i’ve spent most of my time in my room sleeping or doing yoga. i think the problem is whenever i get a lot of free time i just end up thinking a lot and that makes me a wreck.
i’m going to do that new year’s survey i did last...
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i’m going to take a nap and then wake up and do yoga and there’s nothing anyone can do to stop me!!!!!!!!!!
can you just take your negative energy and your passive aggressive behavior and your dumb party planning (or lack thereof) and just go elsewhere please because i think i’m done being friends with you. i’m pretty sure that being around you makes me nothing but miserable. it’s not that you’re never good to me because you can be and you’re really hospitable and...
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the birthday party i didn’t ask for is Cancelled
i just want to sleep until the end of times
such a good krismas eve you guys (:
we went to a christmas party and i looked super cute and my mom’s friend michelle showered me with compliments the whole time!! and there was good food and eggnog and just good company i guess.
and then Presents. god okay my brother got me a fun. poster and i died. it’s gorgeous i love it so much EXCEPT I DON’T KNOW WHERE I’M GOING...
this is most certainly NOT what i should be doing right now,
but i want to talk for a second about what i’ve learned this year. i’ve learned that being comfortable with people is okay, and that it’s easier with alcohol. i’ve learned that being funny isn’t as much of a skill or a talent as it is an accident and that stressing over saying the funniest thing is...
sometimes i don’t get you and it’s hard and more importantly than that i don’t get myself and i can’t focus on learning all of u.s. history from the time of columbus up until the reconstruction era bECAUSE I’M TOO BUSY WISHING YOU WERE HERE
WHY AM I SO TIRED ALL THE TIME
i’m going to
stop worrying
do my english and theatre projects in a timely manner
ace my history final
let things happen naturally
put myself first
stop thinking
if you have never slept in the bed of the girl you like but instead of kissing or anything you just kind of talked and you started out far apart from each other but slowly you got closer and eventually she held you and you fit kind of comfortably
then maybe you should go do that
it’s nice
omg i POSTED THIS TO MY PUBLIC BLOG AM I AN IDIOT OR WHAT
I HOPE THE WHOLE WORLD SAW BECAUSE I...
anyway besides that, my night was very nice! we had a Girls’ Night i guess because it was just blair and lizzy and me. we went to starbucks AND JEFF AND MARGO WERE THERE GOD I LOVE THEM SO HARD and then we fangirled super hard over jeff and then just talked and stuff at starbucks.
then we went to sonic (lol) and there were so many dumb reagan kids so we eventually just left and drove...
does anyone else convince themselves that they are constantly being lied to and that everything they are told is a fabrication because a lot of the time it is?????
no? just me? okay.
when i grow up i want to live in a house that only has fresh food
nothing canned or frozen or powdered and put in a box
i want everything to be vibrant and organic and healthy
yes. all right. this must happen.
everything about feelings is hard and i generally don’t know how to act on them and yeah difficult!!!!!!!!
omg so much for sleeping how do you do this to me
how
if you could put happiness in cups then i would have a lot of cups full of it
i’m going to get my first B of my whole entire high school career this quarter :-(
you guys YOU GUYS the paper is finished and i don’t think i’ve ever been so proud of anything in my life.
i don’t even care that it probably won’t win any awards and a very small percentage of the student body will read it i just DON’T CARE because you know what it’s lovely
i like to tell myself that i think about things other than My Love Life but then i look at my blog
ALL RIGHT BLOG I HAVE SOME THINGS TO TELL YOU
everything happened! all of it! i mean i guess sometimes my life is like a weird lifetime movie where it’s weird but then it’s cute and i’m happy and have i mentioned that i’m happy because….. i’m happy. and scared. and if you’ve never felt both of those things in such huge proportions at the same time...
i miss you
YOU GUYS i’m so bad at doing things
i kind of feel like death
but like happy death
how to fuck up but maybe be okay with it: the kris story
i just want to get drunk off my ass every friday night why is that so difficult to accomplish!!!!!
i’m pretty sure that my mood is always the very opposite of what everyone around me’s is
not going to get into ut “lol” going to be stuck at utsa for two years before i can do anything that i want to do.
not going to finish this print paper on time mostly because i can’t lead even a staff of five people and i’m lazy
also never going to be in a relationship because the only person in the whole world who Likes me is victor and i just don’t know how to...
i keep finding all the really smart kids’ blogs at my school and it’s super super weird but also i want to be friends with them
ok wait i want to tell you things before i forget them
1. v for vendetta is a really really good movie
2. today i was leaving the parking lot as per usual!! with lizzy in the passenger seat and austin honked at me and rolled down his window and was yelling something but i couldn’t hear him or see him i just knew it was him because of his blue truck and i waved and lizzy was like...
i think that maybe i’d be a lot smarter if i had a better memory!